Power to Choose

Choice is one of the most powerful forces I can think of (after energy). This is the simplest concept that's the most overlooked. It's overlooked by parents, friends, relatives, teachers, managers, employees, neighbors, etc. Almost to the point of being ignored. Never by choice though.

Some of the hardest choices I made were the choices I didn't make. The choices I didn't realize I could have made. Think about it. You did the same thing. You also know someone who did the same (or did not that is). Every single step was determined by a choice catalyst from us.

Each of one of us has the power to choose anything we want in this life. You want something, it's yours if you want it. Such an idealistic concept some might say. I don't think so. I believe it to be more logical than anything else.

You made a choice when you decided to skip a day of work. You made a choice when you decided to study for that exam. You made a choice when you decided what career you wanted. All of everything you are now, or more like where you are now, are all the results of choices you made. In some cases, a choice of letting someone else make the choice for you. Regardless, all of the choices made aligned up the necessary steps to make your choice come to fruition.

The other day, my brother said we are destined with certain things meant for us. I sat there listening and my brain could not compute that thought process. I interrupted almost immediately as if I were attacking the poor guy, but I passionately disagreed.

Destiny is as proven as the earth is flat. It's a narrow perception until someone gets far enough to realize it's just not true. This is where choice comes in. You have the power to choose your destiny. It's not determined. If someone can prove otherwise, I'll be happy to listen.

Fate and destiny are the two most famous excuse words I can think of. Excuse of why you don't have something or why your life isn't where you want it to be. If you're using these words to this day, remove them from your vocabulary all together. Throw them out. Stop using these words as the ticket out of accountability. Not to others, but to yourself.

If you want a word, remember fault. It was always your choice to be happy. If you're not, it's your fault. Without going into writing an entire book, just contemplate the root of any complicated situation and where it began. The fault lies within the choice that was not made, leading to the domino affect. You may have never realized at that time you had the power to choose. Worse, you were never taught you did.

It's sad that you can trace back generations where this simple concept wasn't shared somewhere along the line. From my own personal experience, I can attest to how such a valuable lesson would have done wonders in my own life very early on.

Years from now when you are older and even wiser, you won't look at your life as a destiny, but a journey you took with the turns being the choices you made. Forget years from now, why not choose to do so now?

Choice is connected to our instinct. That gut feeling of doing what makes us happy or receive satisfaction.

Maybe it shouldn't be the power to choose, but rather the will to choose.

Well, it is your choice. Always has been. Always will be.

The Company You Keep & The Friendships You Don't

Why do you keep the company you keep?

Humans are a strange bunch. We are motivated by so many good and bad things. There are people we already know and those that we want to know. Our goals are sometimes long term and sometimes short term. For each purpose, we end up utilizing people one way or another because we are smart enough to realize that who you choose to associate with can make the difference between failure and success in reaching a certain goal. At least that is what we would like to believe.

What people fail to realize is successful people had friendships before they reached the proverbial stage of success. There is a tight circle of bond and relationships that existed before wealth or notoriety discovered them, let alone other people. These can be childhood friends, cousins, sisters, brothers, or just about anyone. It is the real friendship unmotivated by greed or desire that helps them blaze their own trails. It is this friendship that lasts when the wealth and notoriety leaves them as well.

Either you are using people or people are using you. True friends don't do either, and there is dignity in knowing this in every relationship you choose to keep. If you couldn't be real friends with a person outside of your motive, the value of the relationship exponentially deteriorates over time, leaving you with truly much of nothing. It's like fighting a natural law; it just won't have the sustenance needed to maintain the connection nor leave you with much fulfillment. After a while, you'll lose interest and energy for trying to essentially 'force' a relationship, or worse, they will just tire of you.

So keep the following question in a back pocket and bring it out once in a while: Would you still be friends with someone if you weren't related by blood or driven by a motive?

Sore New Year

I'm a little late, but late is better then never, right? Yesterday, after weeks of pushing, my little brother Aamir convinced me to go to the gym with him. I can't tell you how difficult it was, because the last time I worked out 'technically' in a gym was back in college when I rowed for the crew team. Ahhh, those were the days!

I know what you're thinking...Jeez that's a long time. To my defense, I worked out at home but never more then a routine of a month because life just happens and it's not easy to keep up with a crazy schedule. Between traveling, shoots, editing, meetings, and then trying to squeeze in a little sleep, it's been a circus of a calendar. The treadmill in the garage would get some usage, but never any of my other equipment. However, after this past weekend's ski trip, my legs aching and burning especially bothered me. I just made up my mind that I've got to make more time or I'm going to pay the price later.

For 2009, just like millions of other hopefuls, I'm setting a goal to actually have a fixed routine. Have to thank Aamir though...his persistence and nagging helped a lot. Because after I came back, I felt sore but fantastic. The energy you feel after a good workout is enough to keep you going.

So if you're in the same boat, don't give up and just do it. Let's see how far we can get through this year...